Feeling Humble About Homeschooling and Blogging

I'm feeling a bit off lately, less confident and less self-assured; perhaps that's what it is? No, I think I'm just feeling humble.

I recall reading (with annoyance at the time), an old column of Linda Dobson's in Home Education Magazine. In her opinion essay she wrote something to the effect that she didn't feel she could give advice to other homeschool parents as what she knew was how to homeschool HER kids not how to homeschool anyone else's. Since she is a person with many years of homeschooling under her belt I was miffed and a bit annoyed. Surely Dobson has wisdom to share, and advice too. I thought, "What a bunch of baloney. What's her problem? She's written books on the subject for goodness sake!" Well that's how I feel lately: unqualified to give advice. (Then again maybe what I give most often is information not advice, so that's okay!)

I've been thinking about it and I think it boils down to this: when parenting and homeschooling very young children, barring major medical issues or early identified learning disabilities, pretty much it's a narrow road to follow. These things are good, those things are bad, do this, avoid that, be mindful of the child's developmental stages, and enjoy them as they grow up so fast.

As kids get older things start to get more complicated. By the upper elementary grades and definitely in the middle school years things start to get complex.

My oldest is about to begin eighth grade. At this point I feel like I'm standing on an entry ramp to a gigantic highway with many roads leading to all different places. My child's own past experiences, more developed personality, known likes and dislikes, strengths and weaknesses automatically narrow down the choices that can be taken. Oh, some of you would say that all options are open, that the child, if driven and guided properly, has all avenues open to him. Let's get real. The personality, internal motivation and desires are definitely a factor and by this age the child is really almost a teenager, and really, is a person. This person is already narrowing down their choices and no amount of external persuasion can force them down a road they don't want to take, not that I'd ever do that to my child anyway! (I won't even get into issues of intelligence and aptitude that narrow a person's options.)

Yet there are so many possibilities out there. Some require money, and so long as the money is there, the options are open. Most are issues though, are of perseverance and work ethic. Do the work; you will open doors to do that. Be lazy and refuse to put forth effort, those three doors close. This is why the child/teen/young adult has to accept personal responsibility and be an active participant in their life's path. Some people say parents or society pushes our children too early. The fact is if you don't do that math in eighth grade you can't do that next level in ninth then they'll not finish calculus by the end of high school. If you don't take the right steps toward your goal you are shutting down options. So choices do matter. What is done and what is not done when does matter (unless a homeschooler does not seek admission to college at the traditional age or wants to spend five or six years doing homeschool high school).

With homeschooling I feel there are so many more options than what schooled kids can experience in these years. A simple example is our highly ranked public school chooses not to participate in the Science Olympiad competition (or Odyssey of the Mind or JETS or Destination Imagination and many other competitions). If I enroll my son into school tomorrow that is one door that closes for him, something he's done for the last two years and learned a lot and received inspiration for science education from. Part of my job right now is finding out about options for my homeschooled kids and making decisions about what they should participate in and which they don't have time for (or interest in).

In this upcoming year I am facing research and decision making. Will my son take online courses for his freshman homeschool high school year? Will he go to community college? Will I hire tutors to teach some content or will I teach it all myself? Will my husband take over teaching some subjects? What homeschool co-op's should we continue with? Will the new community sport interfere with basic academics? What will be done at home versus in the community?

If there is one thing I can tell you about my children's home education it is that each child is a unique individual and they are each receiving a customized education. I therefore am feeling that I know how to homeschool my own kids but not necessarily yours. The more I see the vital role that a child's individuality plays in who they are and who they are becoming as they develop and grow older, the less I feel qualified to dole out advice to other homeschooling parents. The more options I learn about to customize a home education the less I feel I know about or understand all the options.

What I can offer are stories of what we have experienced in our homeschool journey. I know what we've done and what worked for MY KIDS and what didn't work for MY KIDS. I know what worked one year but didn't work the next (indicating it is not the product's fault but some issue with my kids or the way I used and taught the curriculum).

I can share my thinking process and how I came to make certain decisions. You can use these methods also and arrive at your own decisions. Some examples are the brain dominance theories, learning styles, and an awareness of developmental stages. Other examples are the options in teaching reading and math and what academic competitions are available to homeschoolers.

The fact that my kids have so far, never been to school and that we're happy and thriving all these years later is a testament that homeschooling can be done successfully. It is being done by my family. Homeschooling works for other families too. We each follow a unique path. I don't want anyone to copy what I've done with my family as surely it wouldn't be right for you unique children and you as a unique homeschool parent-teacher. I want to offer support and encouragement that any dedicated parent is capable to homeschool their children. Not everyone would ever want to homeschool their kids, that's okay (certainly my mother would not have been a good candidate).

I've been blogging for over five years now. Some days I wonder if it is worth it to continue. I feel like I'm putting myself out there in cyberspace but except for the few comments I receive I don't really know if anyone is reading my writings. I've decided to keep on blogging but lately I've not been in the mood to dole out advice as I just don't feel very qualified as I don't know your children or your circumstances.

This blog will continue to exist for the time being and I'll keep blogging items of interest to me. You'll see some writing about homeschooling and parenting, some photos, book reviews, discussions of food and nutrition and recipes and photos of some food we've made. You'll hear about whatever I'm teaching myself, at the moment it's learning about gardening herbs and using herbs in various ways.

I'm an expert at parenting MY children and homeschooling MY children. I'm not a know-it-all. I'm feeling very imperfect lately. I'm a down-to-earth, non-arrogant person. Lately I'm busy living and doing things and am wondering if anything I have to say really is helping anyone. (This sounds a bit pathetic to see written out though!) I guess I'm sharing this just to let you know I'm not on a high horse, I'm a humble person just trying to do right by my kids and a major thing we're doing to that end is homeschooling. I've taken time daily for the last five plus years to blog about my life and my thoughts here and I hope it is to some good end.

Really though at this moment I keep thinking, "Does anyone really care what I've written here? Who do I think I am to write and blog?" For now I'll keep on blogging...perhaps the day I stop will be the day I get sick of writing out my own thoughts, ideas and opinions!