Wednesday, July 26, 2006

I Will Be More Careful About What I Complain About

I am sure you have heard people say, “Be careful what you wish for or God may give it to you”. The problem with that statement may not seem apparent to some people. The issue is that in order to get us to appreciate various things in our lives we often must first be exposed to something worse and something less desirable in order to then appreciate and be grateful for the better way that things used to be for us!

I ranted last month in this blog entry. The gist of my complaining was that I was overburdened with volunteer work and the other typical work of a mother. I don’t recall if I specifically blogged about in that LONG entry but I know I was feeling resentful of other people who enjoyed the fruits of my volunteer work labor yet I was rarely on the receiving end of such acts of kindness or works of other volunteers. I wanted to be on the receiving end for a change.

Today I regret ever thinking that as now I am on the receiving end of the kindness of strangers and I am in a place of need. It is not a good place to be!

Being in a place where things are good and others come to me looking for help is much better! I now know this for sure!

As my symptoms worsen and my health fluctuates between bad and acceptable but not normal, I have been spending time (when able) to teach myself about Lyme Disease. Also very much in my mind is the health of my two sons, who have both been diagnosed with Lyme Disease (and one with Ehrlichiosis). I definitely have a too-full plate right now with taking in this new and controversial information, digesting it, forming opinions, and making decisions about future health care options.

This week I have been on the receiving end of volunteers and ‘regular citizens’ who officially are not in a volunteer work role but who gave their time and energy to speak to me over the phone and others via email, to help enlighten me and guide me to good sources of information and about the different health care options we have. So here it is, I am the recipient of the goodwill of others.

I am very grateful to the people, these strangers, who are helping me. I don’t know where some of them live but I also know that two strangers live right in my own home town.

This leads me to something else that is important that I want to mention. I am polite and nice or at least cordial to people that I have encounters with in my daily living, such as cashiers, librarians and workers of all kinds who I interact with. Through chit chat with the librarians at my town’s library, over time, I have developed a fondness for some of the librarians and we have some interesting discussions (when they have time) and other times we only have time for just a few words. While I was at the library and feeling very under the weather recently, I was checking out videos for my children to watch while I rested in bed, and I was borrowing a book about Lyme Disease. I know I felt sick and terrible and it probably showed on my facial expression and in my other body language, and I was not my typical self that day. I sensed that this certain librarian sensed that something was wrong. I quickly explained that my kids have Lyme and that I thought I had it also and that I was there on an information gathering mission. It was that quick conversation that not only guided me to an up to date DVD recording of a physician’s seminar about Lyme, but also on the next visit I was asked if I wanted my name passed onto a fellow patron whose family is suffering with Lyme Disease who may be willing to speak to me. I said by all means, yes.

I ended up having a long conversation with one family (strangers to me) yesterday, on the phone.

Today through an International email chat list I was contacted by private email by a person who passed my email to another who passed it to another and so on, and this lovely person who offered to help me via email, lives in my very own small town. Even an atheist would have to admit that such ‘things’ don’t happen by chance. An atheist (and I say this as I was raised in a Godless home) would say, “That is about people helping people and nothing more.” Yes, that is true, it is people helping other people, but God works THROUGH people, not necessarily by direct acts. It is pretty amazing to me that in a very short time of seeking information I have found so many strangers willing to take time to help me. One person spent about an hour on the phone with me today discussing our family’s symptoms, the care we’ve received, the controversies with Lyme and who the local Lyme literate medical doctors (LLMDs) are.

As I was washing dishes a few minutes ago it dawned on me that I got exactly what I had asked for, even though I didn’t realize I was asking for it. I resented that I was maxxed out and burned out with various volunteer jobs for which other people were the main recipients of, and I wanted to be on the receiving end. I wanted someone to help me in some way. I was almost challenging God to let someone else do some volunteer work that would help ME out, to let me be just the receiver and not the giver. Well, I got what I asked for.

I am grateful that people are helping me understand this Lyme Disease thing. To be honest, though, I’d give anything to be completely healthy again, and for each of my children to be Lyme-free and totally healthy again.

So not only will I be careful about what I directly ask God for but I will be careful about what I complain about as well.

I beg you to consider my situation and to take it to your own heart; maybe you can avoid an experience such as I am going through, to learn these lessons:

Be grateful for what you have.

Give when you can give to others, and do it with a loving heart and with good intentions.

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1 comment:

Spunky said...

Excellent reminder. Thanks for sharing it. I love chatting with my librarians as well. I bet we'd have a bunch of great conversations if we lived near each other. I think we have a lot in common.